Blue Balls

I have been receiving numerous emails, phone calls, and text messages asking where I've been.
Allow me to recap the past week of my life.

Spring Training
My whiteness is really beginning to show. I drove to Tempe AZ to watch some pre season baseball.

Why the hell would you drive that far to watch some cracker baseball?

Here are a few reasons why pre season baseball is better than the NBA

1. Great tickets for like 15 bucks.
2. ASU chicks prowling
3. Unlike Charles Barkley, players autograph stuff

And it turns out I didn't miss anything.

Basketball blue balls

Trade deadline looming. Dwight Howard moving. Celtics trading. Lakers scrambling. Suns contemplating....nothing.

Dwight Howard moving was the one thing guaranteed this season - beside the Heat winning it all. And it doesn't look like he's going anywhere. Which means the Magic might as well be cut from the league. Along with the Raptors, Hornets, Wizards, Kings, and Nets.

All this talk about action and nothing going down...you can get yourself kicked out of a car for that kind of stuff.

The Lakers big three should be Arenas, Kobe, and Rasheed Wallace. What happened to that?

The Bachelor

Yes, I have been watching the bachelor, and I tell you what, watching those STD free ladies put their morals aside in order to "fall in love," has been much more entertaining then this injury ridden piece of shit regular season.

Video of the Weak

In honor of the Lakers continuing to suck giant donkey dick on the road, I've decided to post a vid for their fans.

John Ireland with his compact getting himself nice and pretty for another Lakers loss.




I'm going to try my hardest to stop talking about the Lakers.

I'm sick of the 'masked mamba,' their win over Miami, and people thinking they could actually make it to finals.

No one likes to watch two 7 footers clog the paint, clean up Kobe's garbage, and alley-oop without jumping.

I'll talk about the Lakers once they make a trade move or something, but until then I'll continue to watch teams that are entertaining.